Not For The Barber (Part Two: President Jives On the Campaign Trail)

I wonder what the Vegas line is on Donald Trump. I'd like to see what date is set as an Over/Under for him dropping out of the Presidential race.

That bastard is going to spend 500M to paste his filthy name and mugshot on every spot he can, all over America.

rephrase.

All of these bastards, at least the Final Two or Three, are going to spend, AT LEAST, 500M each on the upcoming election.

On what?

Bullshit. Total Bullshit.

Television ads that will run for 30 seconds (ad nauseum for months) and then disappear into space.

Wasted ink & paper on posters nailed into lawns. That will be thrown away. Wasted resources.

Staff to bog us down with emails and phone calls, wasting something more precious than money, our Time.

500M dollars.

If I had that sort of bread stuffed into my ceramic jar from the asian market, labeled FUN MONEY, I would run for President. And here's how:

The Non-Campaign.

Not a single flyer, poster, TV ad. No wasted resources or time.

I would hire 50 of the most honest, intelligent and qualified Humans, one for each state. I would then divide 500M by 50 states. That's the budget each State Czar gets.

Next, the citizens of each state apply for grants.

Hospitals. Schools. Charities. Struggling neighborhoods. Businesses. Firemen. Policemen. Public Works. I don't know. Anyone. Plead your case. Show me you're going to do Good for Humanity and it's yours.

The most needy, the most organized, the most prepared to do Good with the money, would get it.

I trust that the people affected by that money would respond in turn when the time came to punch a ballot.

In summation, instead of spending the money on myself, like you are about to witness candidates from both parties do over the next two years, I would spend the money on Americans. On America. I would literally purchase America's vote.

It's so simple, that I would be surprised no politician has ever tried it...

except I realize that every politician is a selfish, greedy, fear-mongering egomaniac, which is why I don't trust any of them, and never will.

The flaw in my plan is that I'm not qualified to be President of anything, except this blog.

However, no one died when I became President of this blog, and that's what I believe the history books will remember. That's the true legacy of my campaign and administration:

Leadership of Myself, through peace, reason, and humility.