Not For The Barber (Part Two: President Jives On the Campaign Trail)

I wonder what the Vegas line is on Donald Trump. I'd like to see what date is set as an Over/Under for him dropping out of the Presidential race.

That bastard is going to spend 500M to paste his filthy name and mugshot on every spot he can, all over America.

rephrase.

All of these bastards, at least the Final Two or Three, are going to spend, AT LEAST, 500M each on the upcoming election.

On what?

Bullshit. Total Bullshit.

Television ads that will run for 30 seconds (ad nauseum for months) and then disappear into space.

Wasted ink & paper on posters nailed into lawns. That will be thrown away. Wasted resources.

Staff to bog us down with emails and phone calls, wasting something more precious than money, our Time.

500M dollars.

If I had that sort of bread stuffed into my ceramic jar from the asian market, labeled FUN MONEY, I would run for President. And here's how:

The Non-Campaign.

Not a single flyer, poster, TV ad. No wasted resources or time.

I would hire 50 of the most honest, intelligent and qualified Humans, one for each state. I would then divide 500M by 50 states. That's the budget each State Czar gets.

Next, the citizens of each state apply for grants.

Hospitals. Schools. Charities. Struggling neighborhoods. Businesses. Firemen. Policemen. Public Works. I don't know. Anyone. Plead your case. Show me you're going to do Good for Humanity and it's yours.

The most needy, the most organized, the most prepared to do Good with the money, would get it.

I trust that the people affected by that money would respond in turn when the time came to punch a ballot.

In summation, instead of spending the money on myself, like you are about to witness candidates from both parties do over the next two years, I would spend the money on Americans. On America. I would literally purchase America's vote.

It's so simple, that I would be surprised no politician has ever tried it...

except I realize that every politician is a selfish, greedy, fear-mongering egomaniac, which is why I don't trust any of them, and never will.

The flaw in my plan is that I'm not qualified to be President of anything, except this blog.

However, no one died when I became President of this blog, and that's what I believe the history books will remember. That's the true legacy of my campaign and administration:

Leadership of Myself, through peace, reason, and humility.

Not For the Barber (Part One: Religion)

The celebration of the Easter holiday was this past weekend. I heard the joke about Zombie Jesus, many times. I saw flocks of poseurs in line for Sunday Mass.

Somewhere around the 18th Century the Germans brought with them to America the absurdity of the Easter Bunny... and that's all I'll say about that.

I was raised Roman Catholic. I'm not particularly "down" with organized religion anymore. But I have a history with it:

Alter Boy - i was an altar boy from age 8 to 14. I was never molested. I like to joke that I was too short or that my glasses were a turnoff, but that joke is in poor taste. Father Horgan and Father Collins were both intelligent and kind men. There's no denying it was a powerful experience to take part in a ceremony that was based in hundreds of years of history & tradition.

Bishop Fenwick - my parents then "sent me to the Nuns" as they like to say. But this was due to the atrocities of the Georgetown Public School System, not devout religious beliefs. I was in high school when allegations of abuse by priests began. We came to learn of a History of Abuse, ultimately covered up Bernard Francis Law.

A portrait of Bernie hung proudly above the entrance to our school's chapel - even throughout the scandal. By my senior year I had started a petition to get the portrait removed. The general response from my peers was,

"Man, I'm trying to graduate in 6 months, the LAST thing I need is for my name to be on your petition..."

And so I did not pursue it... I probably should have just stolen it myself after hours, and still regret not doing so.

I still grapple with religion today. I do not desire at all to be a member of ANY organized religion. Years of catholicism taught me that God is everywhere, and I can pray whenever I want. No middle men. No fees. Just me and God, talking it out.

These days, I actually don't feel that close to God. or Jesus.

I feel much closer to Ida, Aunt Nell & Uncle Joe, Grandma & Papa, Uncle Leo & Aunt Rose. I feel them all the time.

I find it hard to believe that God watches over us all. I find it much easier to believe that he sub-contracts the work out to his angels.

Boston on Film

I keep coming across films from the pantheon of Great Boston Movies.

What makes a Boston movie a Boston movie is quite subjective. I dare not lay out any specific criteria, for fear of inevitably breaking my own rules.

I believe a majority of people would agree on these six to start (ranked in the order of My Opinion at This Very Moment):

Good Will Hunting, Mystic River, Gone Baby Gone, The Departed, The Fighter, The Town

Two that I absolutely cannot leave off the list for personal reasons (in alphabetical order):

Boondock Saints, Celtic Pride

Minimal research this morning has yielded a final two, filed under New To Me, piquing my interest enough to peruse prices of used copies:

Monument Ave, The Verdict

***

Spring has sprung in Boston. Here's hoping that future posts are about jogging, beachgoers, the characteristics of a good walking stick...

and not being holed up inside.

Although I do love a good film, when the time is right.

Good Old Days

I don't believe in the Good Old Days. I think it's a depressing term that needs to be formally abolished. Erased from the collective mind of society and replaced with a positive outlook towards the Future.

Bruce Springsteen was way out of line with his 'Born To Run' hit "Glory Days"

They will NOT "pass you by in the wink of a young girl's eye", as he attempts to lead us into believing.

The Past offers us much, including lessons learned 'The Hard Way' and sweet memories to appreciate and cherish.

This does NOT mean that we have to forfeit our future.

Sorry Bruce, I'm going to side with Carolyn Leigh, via Frank Sinatra & Count Basie (under the direction of Quincy Jones):

The Best Is Yet to Come. You ain't seen nothing.

Dig

I was fortunate enough to study 'Blues Analysis' with Bruce Katz at Berklee. Mr. Katz is a monster & master of the piano and Hammond B3. Check him out if you haven't already.

One day, during said point in my life, I was killing time. On a computer. Very much like you are now.

I decided that instead of trolling the choppy waters of the internet in a vain attempt to discover brain-numbing Entertainment, I would instead research my new professor. See if he had a website, or any upcoming gigs I could check out.

Did he ever.

Alexis P. Suter and his band were performing a string of gigs at Levon Helm's Midnight Ramble. Bruce was on the keys.

After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I made my way to class.

I mentioned to Bruce, as casually as I could, how Levon Helm and the music of The Band had shaped me into the man I was today. Amazing enough, Mr. Katz cordially invited me to be a guest of his at a Ramble.

A few clicks, a bit of reading, and a conversation led to a life experience I will never forget.

What can you accomplish instead of wasting time?

Change Is Good

A vivid memory of childhood is at a neighbor's house in Georgetown. In their father's closet was a wooden basket filled with spare change. Every day after work he emptied his pockets into the basket.

In my mind, he would periodically exchange the baskets for large piles of money, with which he would arrange lavish vacations and parties for his family.

I'm not sure if that was true or not, but to this day I keep a pretty firm grasp of my spare change. The drive side door of my Volkswagen is known as the Penny Door.

I emptied it recently and my own containers, a brass genie lamp and a ceramic jar from the asian market, are both overflowing. I look forward to the lavish parties that will result from this change.